another post in one week.....eh why not?

this week has been full of downs....all downs and no ups. and im not talking about the stuff the went on this blog either....i've just been very down lately....a lot family issues going on...im not going to talk about it because its way too personal...i already revealed whats been going on with my mom anyways. i've got into a car accident the day after my last day at work...my car is wrecked and we had to junk it because there was too much damage. so i have no car right now...i am looking for one....right now we're trying to sell the house...we got a cleaner and lawn mowers to keep the house in shape and looking neat.... because of how the market is right now the house needs to be in pristine condition.

i havent talked about a lot of issues going on in the country here lately so here's my thing on healthcare.
i dont care what we get right now as long as its better than what we currently have. republicans should shut the hell up about "death panels" and crap like that. sarah palin should just stick her alaskan ass back in russia with her idiotic comments....i honestly would've left the country had mcain died in office. having that dumb bimbo in office makes me lose even the littlest faith i did have for this country.
people honestly should shut the hell up and let obama do his job....i think he's doing a good job in cleaning up. bush better run and hide for the rest of his pathetic life along with cheney...because they both messed this country up so bad we've forgotten what its like to have good leadership and we may never recover from their actions.

thats it for now....i'll put some photography and more poetry up when i get the chance. till then....

its late ......so here it goes

one of my biggest passions in life is to write....anyone who knows me will know this. i write on this blog to escape...and sometimes i rant (which i always forget to edit out) but honestly i dont mean anything i say on those rants and i clearly did offend someone on here. i get hot headed at times and i dont think straight. so im sorry for that. the reason im apologizing is that there are a lot of people that who've seen me but do not actually know me. and that is partly my fault because i keep a guard up. there are some comments that actually hurt me and i have not told anyone about it except for one person...i know those comments that were made were made out of anger...and they were made out of anger cause i had an angry post....but believe me im not an angry person....i just had a really bad day.again i dont mean to say anything to hurt anyone. the reason i vent here and not anywhere else is that i can't vent anywhere else. that blog was made a while ago too...back when my stress level was at its highest.i just dont want anyone to think badly of me just from that one post.
im a hippy so i love everyone, and everything....okay maybe i kill bugs...but i do meditate....and i do not wish bad anyone.

let me entertain you

wow another season gone just like that....there were good times and some not so good times this summer. but i had fun this summer working at the awesome show called showstoppin at six flags this year. every year our department, the entertainment department, holds an annual EIE awards party....its kinda like the oscars but instead of best actress, its best team player and so i had such a great time with great people.

he's a sweetheart..

we both have the same birthday!!!!

we were supposed to work together last year.....but everyone got fired or quit so that didnt happen

love her...she's one of my favorite people...i went to school with her.

he won for best grand music hall person or whatever....james is the BEST dancer i've ever seen!!!! NO LIE! the guys in the back is the rest of the show stoppin cast

dont really know everyone here too well except for the two girls on the right and left

ahhh rachael.....she's the most amazing supervisor i had last year....i forgot to take a pic of my supervisor this year...megan...she's pretty awesome as well.


I worked with these guys this year


i worked with her last year

she's just someone i run into all the time

i really mean it when i say james is the best dancer i've ever seen. people who know me would know that ive been performing onstage (on and off) since i was seven. this includes singing, dancing and acting. i have seen my share of talented people....but honestly the showstoppin cast is the most talented bunch i have ever met. those guys are going to do great things....i hope they remember me when they become famous.

i dont wanna fall back in

im trying so hard not to fall back into a deep depressed state i was in for most of my late teens. it was incredibly hard for me to get out of that mind set and even harder not to go back because of all the craziness that's happening. its also hard to stay positive when u know the reality of the situation. i keep everything inside only to yell at a family member who doesn't deserve it. who can i yell at? i can't yell at amanda at work who accused me of doing nothing while there is stuff to be done. i can't yell at megan, my supervisor who won't give me a day off unless i switch with someone because she "can't have one host working the theater" (i say too damn bad because i did it all the time at picto last year, once with no tech at all for one show) no one wants to hear me bitch and moan. im sick of this. now my mom is back in the ER again because of severe stomach cramps, she's probably gonna have a colonscopy. the stress is insane im expected to do everything and im not able to. i have a number of projects due by the end of the month, my mom is a ticking time bomb, and im going nuts.

i have written a song about a guy i can't have though.
it's called "someone you already knew"
Someone You Already Knew
chorus

do you try to make me feel this way?
do you know what you to do me when you're away?
i feel so helpless cause there's nothing to do
you're in love with someone you already knew

verse 1
She probably knows who you are
front to back
side to side
in and out
but does she really know what you're all about?
I know that you're fun quirky and smart?
but do you really want to be with a real pop tart?
I'm the one you and and boy that's for sure
she's all that you want but I can give more.

chorus
oh its nothing she loves you
oh its nothing, and boy i know its true
you're happy and she does you no harm
you have that wit that soul that charm
oh i know it, you love her its true
oh i know it they all love you too
go ahead make her day
you know her better anyway

chorus
you're in love with someone you already knew
oh you're in love with someone you already knew
in love with someone you already knew.

nice right? im thinking of christina aguilera's "candyman" mixed with maroon 5's "until your over me" for the music. and christina aguilera singing it of course.
well that's it for now