i wrote a song

it was during my free hours at school.



it has sort of an evanesence feel to it. i dont know if this is a song that LP can pull off, i sound like i have been writing songs to artists forever, but i havent. i actually dont write too many songs. and i dont get paid to (although i wish i did) write songs for artists. and yes i do know that LP and evanesence (as far as i know) write their own songs. but one can dream cant they?

My Own Worst Enemy
(acapella soft)
I feel so trapped beneath me with this pain
Lunging around me like an open cave
I don't think this will ever mend
This could all be coming to an end

(cue drums, and guitars)

Please stop pretending that Im not there
Please stop pretending that you dont care
because its not fair
that you left me here all alone
in the dark where it's so cold
and when I lie on my bed
I taste the tears that I shed
When I sleep its nothing but you in my dreams
and I hold my breath so I cannot scream

Chorus
Why dont you walk away like you always do?
Why dont you run around me because I wont move.
Now I see
You are not who I'd thought you be
My own worst enemy

verse 2
I loved you for so long
I prayed for you so you could belong
but you couldnt see the sacrifice that I made
I was in pain, couldnt breathe couldn't make a sound
Lying here helplessly on the ground.
and its now that you realize that you need me around.

Oh I wish I could turn back time
so you could see that your mistakes werent mine

chorus 2x

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
I tried and I cried
All those years and all those times I've wasted on you
You still can't look me in the eye and tell me the truth.
Now I know who you are, and thats not what I want to be
My Own Worst Enemy
My Own Worst Enemy

You didnt catch me when fell
Now you put me in this hell
I want to blame this all on you
but in the end, its all my fault.

and I tried and I cried
All those years and all those times I've wasted on you
You still can't look me in the eye and tell me the truth.
Now I know who you are, and thats not what I want to be
My Own Worst Enemy

You're not you I thought you'd be
My own worst enemy.
songwriter: Supriya

well thats it....leave some feedback. i'll post something regular next week.

i know its been forever

i know, i havent posted in a while, ive been busy and my best friend was in the hospital. today's topic is about religion and spirituality. i havent always been a fan of religion. im was raised a hindu and i hated the way that things were taught to me. "fear god supriya" thats what was basically told to me my entire life. i went to a damn sunday school that taught me this crap. what they said was basically "you dont love god/religion/ect, if you dont pray everyday, take bath and go to the place of worship" and i was like "but doesnt god love everyone?" and they wouldnt answer me. i believe in somethings of my religion, like that we all reincarnate after we die. that there is life after death. there is a god, or a higher being. i believe in prayer, but i don't believe in asking god for things that we did to ourselves. here's what i dont believe (any religion): i don't believe that god "says" things in whatever book or scripture the religion is based on. i dont believe that doing ritual religious things will get you closer to god. what bugs me the most is when people pray, do pooja or whatever ritual thing they do, go to the temple or church, and not knowing WHY they do it. "oh i do it for my family" or "i do it cause i've been doing it my whole life" the point of religion is to have some sort of order in society. back in the day when the US was still colonizing, most of the orders and laws were religion based, and it still is religion based ("in trust of god" on our money, "one nation under god" in our pledge of alligience and swearing to tell the truth on the bible in court, ect). its clear that religion has done major damage to the world and i think we shouldn't have any religion. i say let's be spiritual. let's go and meditate for about an half hour, that'll be our ritual. lets go pray and LISTEN to the god that we know and love since god is one. that would be our sunday mass. if we all did that, there would be no war, there would be no disagreements, there would just be love and happiness. i know i sounded like i smoked some weed, but seriously we should ban religion. there would be much chaos, but the change would be for the better.

in other news, AIG is planning to use 10% of the 700 billion dollars bailout to use for get this.........BONUSES! if they do this...it'll be the last straw. im telling you we are very very very close to revolt. and before you know it, it'll be like the "shadow of the day" video. where everyone is going rioting, going nuts against the government. this country is in a very deep hole and it will be a very long time till we get out. not obama, not mcain, not palin (to hell with her and her maverick) and not biden, can stop what is going to happen to this country. as the awesome adrianne curry says "we're seeing the fall of rome people"

so long for now, i gotta get ready for class and i have to turn in a appeal to the parkside police dept. ugh. i hope it goes well.